If the past 35 years of struggling with my weight have taught me anything, it’s that I simply cannot do this alone. I’ve tried. Probably hundreds of times… and I don’t even want to think about the money I wasted…
But as I reflect on those years… the one thing I was missing was someone to be accountable to. I had people pushing me… and encouraging me (sometimes)… but I had no one that I had to “answer” to. No one that I gave a crap about that truly gave a crap about me. Because if you don’t have someone that you care about to answer to… then there’s no accountability. No reason to follow through — especially if you don’t care enough to do if for yourself.
Let’s face it… the ONE person you SHOULD be accountable to is YOURSELF. But, I’ve met very few people who can honestly say with 100% truth that they don’t need anyone… that they can do it by themselves…
I certainly can’t. I NEED accountability. I need a person (or two or three) in my life that I honestly CARE what THEY THINK! Someone who will cry with me when I’m at the end of my rope… someone who will celebrate with me when I have a true honest to goodness victory… and most importantly someone who will kick me in the butt when I’ve gone off the rails.
It’s not that easy to find someone who can fill all those roles.
First, it has to be someone that I trust…. and trust DOES NOT come easy for me (thank my ex-husband for that). Second, it has to be someone that I respect.
Trust and respect… two very important traits when it comes to accountability.
For trust to manifest, it requires vulnerability and willingness. That’s hard for someone who has been hurt or let down one too many times before. We build walls… to protect ourselves and it’s really hard to tear them down. The right person has to earn their way over that wall and sometimes that can happen quickly and sometimes it takes time. For me, it has to happen organically. It can’t be forced. It has to happen naturally.
Respect is a whole different ballgame. This is something that has to develop… and be demonstrated with actions, not words.
Anyone who knows me knows that I am actually quite socially introverted. I don’t like to be the center of attention, especially in a place where I am in unfamiliar territory. I’m a watcher. I’m a listener. I think through my words very carefully before speaking. And I’m generally one heck of a good judge of character. Earning my trust and respect is tough.
So how do I deal with finding the right person?
I work to BE the person I want to FIND.
In the classroom, every year I taught Mahatma Gandhi’s words… “Be the change you want to see in the world.” And I meant it. I demonstrated it every. single. day. I was the teacher that rocked the boat and challenged the status quo. I wanted to make a difference and doing things just because that’s the way they were always done, didn’t cut it for me. Our world is changing… our kids are our future… we have to change too.
So, what does that mean for me here in this world of nutrition that I’ve created?
It means that I will GIVE you everything I NEED in an accountability partner.
With that being said… I am only one person and there are nearly 24,000 members in my group. Can I be the accountability partner for all 24,000? Sorta… and for some, yes. But that is not going to stop me from trying!
I’M HERE FOR YOU!
Just like Jo Michienzi and Jessica Hendrix are here for me. Do we talk daily? No. Do we get upset with each other… oh ya. But do I love them and TRUST them and RESPECT them. DEFINITELY. Can I go to them with anything… literally? You bet.
And in my business world, Megan Lockhart and Lisa Robinson hold me accountable for being a kick-butt entrepreneur and business owner. They push me further than I ever thought I could go. They believe in me and encourage me and are honest with me. They tell me when some hair-brained idea I have is stupid… and they cheer me on when I strike gold!
I need them. ALL.
And if you don’t have someone like that… I hope you can find one. Maybe it’s me. ❤️
So very blessed to have you in my life and us keep each other going!!
I believe in what you’re doing. I believe in your philosophy on nutrition and taking care of yourself. I think you are hands-down the best, most inclusive center I have found for help after bariatric surgery. Thanks for putting yourself out there and your help for so many people – and for making it delicious and creative.
Love that day and that picture of us. Glad to have been apart of what you’ve built. Amazing! I’m so happy for you! ♥️